Maybe people would not tell others "How to play their game" if they kept in mind that a MMORPG is not a single player game and that there are very fair and understandable expectations from anyone partaking in multiplayer content.
-Your time is not more valuable than my time.
-Your fun is not more valuable than my fun.
-Your needs are not more valuable than my needs.
-Your way to play the game is not more valuable than my way.
But precisely because we are all different and it impossible for every group to cater to every single way to play, the only fair and democratic way to play the game is for everyone to do their best and do a honest effort at success whenever multiplayer content is participated in.
Because doing so puts everyone on the same ground, gives an equal amount of responsibility, and ultimately, benefits everyone as well.
And to suggest that we should just party with our friends or play only within premades is to completely miss the point and to put the blame and the solution where it does not belong.
It is not WE who are wrong, it is YOU, the lazy, the selfish, who are in the wrong , so it is you who should change and adapt, not us.
And yeah sure, i know that realistically speaking, that is not going to happen, because lazy people are gonna laze and selfish people are gonna self-interest.
But at the very least let us not pretend the responsibility or fault falls to those who play the game the way it is intended and who contribute to success.
You say that i sound condescending by my demands?
To me, someone who believes he or she can do whatever they want and screw anyone they may be partied with because "Noone tells me how to play" is way more condescending and selfish.
To me, someone who believes everyone else is there for their use and service and to carry them because they feel lazy, tired, or cannot be arsed, is way more condescending and selfish.
Other people in MMORPG are not NPC, they are not there for you, they are there to play the game WITH you, not FOR you.
If your style of play is "My way or the highway" then either go play single player games or play solo, you have no right whatsoever to purposefully underperform because of your personal quirks.
Just because no-one can stop you, it does not mean you are right to do so.
P.S: And because i already see the false equivalences coming, let me explain, before you even say it, that no, expecting everyone to do their part is not the same as imposing your way on everyone else.
When everyone does an equal amount of effort, everyone has the same responsibility and everyone gets rewarded equally, therefore, while it is true that it may not be the preferred way to play of everyone in the group, it is the most fair outcome.
No-one is asked to do more or less than the other player.
When a single player´s "My way or the highway" is imposed, everyone else is required extra effort with no benefit to them, it only benefits the one player.
So no, telling people to do their part is not equivalent to imposing one´s way.