@coldreactive said in Some localization missteps on a screenshot already:
Based on past data, we expect Pettas Vera, the Command DOLLS unit, to be there.
Based on past data, we expect Pettas Vera, the Commanding DOLL unit, to be there.
DOLLS with an S is the name of the opponent, isn't it? I could be wrong but I thought its singular form was still DOLLS. Perhaps the bigger question is whether Command should have a capital C. If it's just a word to mean leader then I wouldn't expect it to be, but if "Command DOLLS" is a term then it could be accurate.
Honestly I'm more put out by there being three commas, after every fourth word. (Amusingly if you take out the last four words from the suggested revision, it literally becomes a haiku with the commas perfectly placed for it.)
I'm no language major but I think two are sufficient to provide a pause either to clarify what a Pettas Vera is or to name the commanding DOLLS unit. Respectively:
- Based on past data we expect Pettas Vera, a commanding DOLLS unit, to be there.
- Based on past data we expect the commanding DOLLS unit, Pettas Vera, to be there.
Between the two it's probably just preference. The latter could replace both commas with inverted commas for the same effect. They could also restructure the sentence so either of those subjects is at the end and reduce the number of commas to one. For instance:
- Based on past data we expect the presence of Pettas Vera, a commanding DOLLS unit.
And yes this is all a bit nitpicky but this is a beta which is both our chance to give translation feedback and also our chance to express how eager we are haha.